Happy Birthday To Big Time Dates

Apr 8

(those are breasts)

One year ago today I introduced Mark to blogging and podcasting with my audio tech show, Sound Design Live. We got to talking about how everyone is scrambling to promote their own personal brand online through content marketing and how best to slap them in the face with jokes.

MARK: Wouldn’t it be funny if we used compelling headlines under the pretext of offering valuable content from likable experts, only, there’s no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, just jerks.

NATHAN: I don’t know if that would be funny so much as incredibly annoying.

So we dropped that idea and instead created Big Time Dates, the world’s most valuable 30-second dating advise podcast. We created the website and posted our first podcast the same day, becoming an instant success. Here is the total number of unique visitors at the end of April 8th calculated by our Chief Analyst756,895.907.z589. Thanks to all of our listeners for the support. Obviously, we don’t need it, but if you just happen to have 4 minutes to waste, go to iTunes and paste in one of these reviews:

  1. What a great idea! ★★★★★★
    1. I’ve been listening to Big Time Dates from the beginning, way back. In that time I’ve come to greatly admire their dating and relationship advise. I’ve disagreed a handful of times… just kidding, who would ever disagree with pure truthism? It is frank, accurate, serious, and self-less. Their language may be a bit shocking at first, but if that bothers you then you should probably move along grandma. Big Time Dates is blowing up taboos, not massaging your ego. You can send your questions and sexual propositions to nathan@bigtimedates.com and it’s entirely anonymous, besides the part where they read your name and social security number on the air and stalk your family.
  2. Big Time Dates broke my heart. ★★★★★
    1. Nathan and Mark dated me hard for about 30 seconds, then just disappeared. No phone calls or anything, just the faint echo of “Bastrop county bitch.”
  3. Perfect example of excellence. ★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★
    1. Pros – Same kind of absurd banter you’d expect if you’re a friend of the hosts. What ever skills Nathan and Mark have they employ to make you feel confused and awkward. Cons – Only comes out once a week. Pros – I come every day. P.S. If you subscribe, Nathan and Mark will suck your dick.
  4. Who would Jesus date? ★★★★★
    1. Is it a coincidence that Christians like me believe that Jesus rose from the dead on the same day that Big Time Dates was create?
  5. Slovak so hard? ☿☿☿☿☿
    1. I am from Slovakia and we have fun sex party now! If you want to live with wolves you have to howl with them. The lie has short legs. People burned. I’m in knots TV. Great BDT!
  6. Complete transformation! ★★★★★★
    1. I had not dates before, but now I have no dates! Thankssss Big Time Datesssss!!!
  7. From soft to hard.
    1. Women never talked to me before. Then I found Big Time Dates so it doesn’t matter anymore. That, plus I discovered internet porn.
  8. Dick Chart! ★★★★
    1. I used to be concerned with penis size then one day I was working on a chart for my stats class and stumbled upon Dick Chart. So glad to know I’m on the right path!
  9. Too busy getting my date sucked. ★★★★★
    1. If you were to take a look in my diary you would find blank pages because I’m too busy getting laid, all thanks to Big Time Dates.
  10. Best years of my life. ☺☺☺☺☺
    1. I’ve been listening to Big Time Dates for years now. At least 5 or 6 years, solid. When I went to renew my drivers license I notice that there’s a check box for Orgasm Donor and I feel way more confident in checking it now. Thanks BTD!

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